Masturbation Myth
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We post regularly on forums to help individuals struggling with sexual addiction issues. One of the most frequent questions that we receive are about masturbation.
Myth #1 masturbation is ok?
Myth #2 masturbation is healthy?
In our experience, the answer to these questions is ... NO!
Here is a recent post we made, asking this question, "I am a happily married man and have great sex but I find... I'm always in need for it". This individual received several responses from saying, yes to giving him advice on how to do it and tools to use.
I was floored this advice was being given. Here was our response:
I disagree with all of these comments. You obviously think it is wrong because you are asking the question. Otherwise, you wouldn't be asking it.
You don't want to get addicted to porn so avoid the videos, dolls, etc... that were recommended. We see people on a regular basis trying to get over their sex addiction issues like masturbation, porn, etc.
The best thing would be to talk with your wife about it. Are you both ok with it?
This might help to explain a little more about the bond that happens during intercourse or sexual arousal:
Oxytocin is released in high amounts during sexual experiences. This bonding creates companionship and a feeling of togetherness during sexual intercourse. Oxytocin is also released during visual arousal, however; When sexually aroused without a committed partner through means such as pornography or masturbation, the recipient of Oxytocin is left feeling alone, depressed and confused, despite the rush of dopamine. See the dangerous irony? Oxytocin has the power to sexually bond a committed couple in healthy and meaningful ways or it can destroy an individual with feelings of emptiness and depression.
Oxytocin is a chemical "glue" seeking something to bond with. When there is no bonding, isolation and secrecy result. Pornography and masturbation is an Oxytocin powerhouse leaving a wake of emptiness and confusion to all those it claims.
Since she (your wife) is not there to form this bond, you are trying to bond with your self. I again go back to my first response. You would not be asking this question if you did not feel it was wrong inside.
Best of luck!
Sexual addiction issues enslave millions every day. Don't get caught in the traps.
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Sexual addiction issues are the most misunderstood and the most difficult to learn how to manage them.
why sexual addictions? I thought heroin/meth addictions are the hardest ones?
Whether drugs, alcohol, gambling, or sexual; addiction effects the same part of the brain. Different addictions carry different health consequences and withdrawal symptoms, even visible and debilitating. Drugs such as meth and heroin are such examples making them easy to diagnose and quantify. However, other addictions create similar dopamine rushes and alter the neurological makeup of the brain in similar fashion to identifiable drugs. Saying which addiction is "harder" is all about the nature of the addict. Some dual addicts claim their sexual addictions were much more difficult to gain sobriety in vs. their drug addictions.
The instinctive (limbic) part of our brain is where survival, pleasure, and avoiding pain takes place. This part of the brain is where addiction manifests as life's issues create pain and where activities/substances that bring pleasure become compulsive. This limbic part of the brain reacts in creating a "craving" and repeated behavior for those substances or activities that bring pleasure despite negative consequences and promises to stop. Neurological pathways are damaged and the connections between our logical brain and limbic brain are altered. So heroin, meth, gambling, sex addiction, pornography...they all create addictive pathways in similar ways.
This is very interesting and seems to make sense. I am interested in NeuroScience and I would very much love to know where you got this information from. Could you please cite the journal or research where you got this information from please?
Thank you!
We stated: "Oxytocin is released in high amounts during sexual experiences." One research study begins to explore the levels of Oxytocin at times of Orgasm. http://joe.endocrinology-journals.org/cgi/reprint/
So much research is still to be done. Other base studies have shown hugging and touching to produce Oxytocin. It's beginning stages of research were done on Women and their bond with their babies. Recently, more studies are being done regarding men and Oxytocin levels.
The fact is that Oxytocin does increase significantly during sexual arousal: http://jcem.endojournals.org/cgi/content/abstract/
Oxytocin is a bonding chemical. It is also called the"Cuddle Chemical." When no bonding takes place, one can see why so many feel emptiness and isolation.
Why not bond with God and yourself first? Remember, your wife or your girlfriend can leave you at a moment's notice. Make yourself a eunuch for the sake of the Kingdom of God. You will not regret that.
Edin 2 years ago
Wow... I find this completely true.